(I started this post over a week ago and time got away from me to sit down and finish it..)
Last night I was finally able to meet the members of the Girls With Sole program. I wrote about this program while training for Disney, having dedicated that race to help raise money to fund the first program here in Charleston.
Unfortunately for my schedule, the program runs Monday afternoons when I am at work. I took a day off yesterday so that I could at least participate in one of the sessions. Assuming each session is run similarly (and I’m pretty sure they are), the girls meet and sit at a big table where they have a snack before heading outside. Today, the workout was a few soccer drills and a half mile run, split into eighths (slow, fast, slow, fast etc). The three coaches (myself and two others runners) each took a small group of similarly paced girls. Afterwards, we all meet back inside for a final activity – this time it was to talk about role models and the qualities the girls see in those they look up to.
Before the program began, the director was explaining the plan for the day and how we were going to split up into groups. She admitted she has had some difficulty getting the girls motivated to run, as many of them either aren’t particularly interested, or are easy to say that they are done once the tire, as they haven’t yet learned to pace themselves. She also mentioned that there is hope to start another program closer to my area, if it would be something Id be interested in.
The three girls I ran with ran pretty well, and I think a couple, if not all of them could be good runners. I hit a 6:10 pace at one point, and although it was only for about a tenth of a mile, two of them kept up with me. I thought most of that hour and a half, and since then, though, if I were to be a more frequent coach in this program, what could I say to help these girls like running? What could I do to encourage them to keep trying?
Girls in this program are here because they are either at risk for or have already experienced abuse or neglect sometime in their lives. They have already had a rough road. Some like running, some don’t, but all at least seemed to enjoy the physical activity. Fifth grade seems like such a long time ago that I find it hard to come up with a way to relate to girls who are ten and eleven years old.
I do remember that I didn’t always like running. I ran down baselines and across a soccer field, but to run for no other reason than to run made no sense to me. Track seemed silly, cross country even crazier. Although I was active I wasn’t a runner until college, when I often felt overwhelmed (for lack of a better word). I’ll never forget the first step I took out the door, across the quad, and about a halfway down the street. I’d bet I only ran a quarter mile total before I was completely out of breath. Physically tired, but emotionally better, even in that short distance. I feel like I can understand these girls in the sense that they need an outlet for these feelings they are experiencing, but can’t understand what it is like to live in their shoes and their homes. I have written often about the reasons why I run, and many of them surround things like sanity and the ability to deal with hard issues and feelings.
But how do I make it relatable?
Journey To the Finish Line 
May 12, 2016 at 9:13 pm
I am not sure you need to make it relate. I believe you need to be there to show you care, to listen when they talk and encourage them when they need it. When you show you care and gain trust through listening you will find what works for them and you then. You don’t need to relate, you need to be there for them. Theresa you have much to offer these little ones take it slow and let God work with you and through you. Love You Dad
May 12, 2016 at 10:39 pm
I used to coach youth track in Florence. Yes, some of them will complain and want to stop. Many will not be there because they want to run- that’s how it goes with girls that age (a lot of times, they are there because they want to be with friends).
The one thing I took away from coaching is that you never know what the running program is to one of those kids. I coached kids who were offered drugs at school, kids were who bullied, and kids whose parents went through ugly divorces. One kid was special needs (Asperger’s), and not all the other coaches and parents realized that. It was a competitive program, but above all… I just wanted the kids to leave at the end of the night feeling proud of themselves. For some kids, that’s All American. For others, that’s completing the 1/2 mile warmup jog without stopping. You have to be especially positive because the running might be the only positive thing in their day (school is a lot different now…). In the end you’re coaching the kid not the sport…. but you would be really good at it.
May 13, 2016 at 6:38 am
Thanks. This session is almost over but I’m seriously considering running one once the Ironman is over if we can get a session up a little closer to Summerville.
May 13, 2016 at 11:14 am
I agree that you may not need to make it reate. But one way I can think of is how running with you is a step for them for controlling their own lives. They are running for themselves and not anyone else. Nobody will ever be able to take that away from them. And they may find that as they grow up to be women someday, that running is part of what makes them who they are.
I do a yoga DVD and on one particularly challenging ab pose, the trainer says how this is a gift you are giving yourself. Even if you have millions of dollars, you can’t pay anyone to move your body like this. I know it’s kinda cheesy but I love that. Them running with you is teaching them that they are allowed to be their own person, no matter what their past has held.
Kudos to you for opening yourself up in this way! I think it’s amazing!
May 14, 2016 at 10:53 am
i agree that its not so much about being relatable but rather providing a sense of trust, mutual respect and by offering a “safe zone” for these young girls. Even though you cant control what goes on in their lives beyond practice, the weekly practices will help give some sort of constant, something familiar, somewhere “safe” that will hopefully allow them to feel a sense of belonging. When life gets unpredictable, as it is often with the case of abused/neglected children, having something stable (ie weekly/dailey practice) will help, and having the same mentors that develop trust and respect only adds to assist in helping these young ladies. I am sure you will do an awesome job!!!!