Today I had a laugh at myself moment.

Everyone is familiar with the children’s story The Very Hungry Caterpillar, right?

As a quick recap, basically the caterpillar is hungry and he eats through foods every day of the week but is still hungry. On Monday he ate through one apple, but he was still hungry. On Tuesday he ate through two pears but he was still hungry. And so on all the way through Saturday when he had himself a caterpillar sized buffet and ended up with a stomachache. In the end he turns into a butterfly. (I wonder how hungry butterflies are)

A friend at work recently commented that since becoming pregnant, I talk about food an awful lot. This was proven when, at lunch yesterday, I declared what I was planning to have for dinner. Truthfully, I haven’t been this food obsessed since my teenage/college days of counting calories (God knows why because I wasn’t anywhere near overweight).

Today at lunchtime I took an out loud mental note of what I had eaten that day. Pop parts, a nutra grain bar, a cheese stick, some pretzels, a protein bar….and I was still hungry.

It was then that I nicknamed myself The Very Hungry Preggapillar. And here is my story (slightly exaggerated for dramatic effect, only bc I could never eat 4 yogurts at once):

One day, there was a young girl who just LOOKED at her husband and ended up pregnant with twins. (HA! KIDDING!) She awoke each morning feeling as though her stomach had been empty for days. So, she ate.

At 7am, she ate one half of a bagel with cream cheese, but she was still hungry.

At 8am she ate two mugs (yes, mugs – I did this once for portion control and bc I like refills) of cereal, but she was still hungry.

At 9am, she ate 3 cheese sticks, but she was still hungry

At 10am, she ate 4 yogurts, but she was still hungry

At 11 am, she ate 5 licorice sticks, but she was still hungry

At noon, she ate a sandwich, an apple, some doritos, some carrot sticks, two cookies, some Mike and Ikes and turkey pepperoni. She got a stomachache.

At 1pm, she was still hungry.

At 2 pm, she ate 2 bites of salad. And then the babies exclaimed “are you freaking kidding me mom? Are you trying to STARVE us to death? Are you prepared to live with that kind of guilt?!?!”

So she ate the whole salad….and a cupcake.

After 8 months of this, she was a big as a house.

The End.

I could totally get a book deal with this, right?

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