This summer brings with it a couple of monumental dates for me.
July 1, 2012 – what will be the first day of our first IUI, bringing with it all of the fun things like injections and dates with “Bob” (he sure took a long time to call me back! butthead….)
August 19, 2012 – my 30th birthday. (in 57 days. But who’s counting?)
I’m a bit ambivalent about both. Normally, I love my birthday, and make excuses for why Bryan should run out and get me the ice cream I’m demanding because “it’s my birthday week” (I’ve also gone as far as birthday month before). Bring on the birthday cards, the cake, the candles, the stupid birthday song. I feel like a 5 year old on my birthday (most of the time).
I think we all have plans for our lives, and time frames in which we hope to achieve these plans. For some reason that I’m not even sure I understand, I had always planned to have children before the age of 30, and as I am quickly approaching this milestone, I’m clearly outside my timeline. In some ways I’m starting to feel “age”(and yes I realize this is only the beginning), but for the most part don’t feel “old”, physically or mentally. In fact I feel better than I did physically or emotionally at 20. I’m in better shape and I have a clearer head.
Fertility, though, is a different story. I get that most of it is mental, but 30 rounds the corner to the dreaded “advanced maternal age” and comments from the RE regarding how young I still am [being under 30] that will no longer exist. Plenty of people nowadays have kids after 30 – by choice, and yet for some reason this milestone is bothersome to me. I really think otherwise, I wouldn’t care less about turning 30. (though I did have a brief moment of feeling quite old after going to the bar with my 21 year old sister after graduation, after I was the one who declared at 2am that it was time for all of us to go back because I was tired). Fertility is the only area in which I dread age and feel old.
I’m hoping that, as a result, I’m not putting too much stress and hope into this procedure being able to bring me at least a pregnancy before 30. I decided already that I don’t want any procedures in August because I want to enjoy this milestone without infertility lingering over my head. We booked a long weekend in Daytona, Florida and I’m really looking forward to it.
I think I’m going to try to take things one day at a time. I’m finding myself more relaxed recently after letting go a bit – we are enjoying the heck out of the house improvements we did and I don’t want to get wrapped up in anticipation or dread. I don’t want to spoil any more of my life in disappointment and expectation.
I’d like to allow the 5 year old in my to enjoy the anticipation of my day.
Which includes a countdown. Also, kudos to anyone who read this blog title WITHOUT singing the song either aloud or to yourself.
** As an addition, for those of you who read about my Groupon Adventure, I made my hair appointment and was disappointed to get a text a few days ago saying she is no longer accepting the groupons. Apparently, they never paid her. I received a credit, but now no hair appointment. Drat.
June 23, 2012 at 12:31 pm
Birthdays are rough when you’re dealing with infertility. I hope you get your birthday wish for a pregnancy with this upcoming IUI. Best of luck!
June 23, 2012 at 4:04 pm
me too, but I’m trying to keep in mind that statistically we only have about a 25% chance. However, I’m curious to see if, with a normal number of swimmers and a shorter distance, if “we” could pull this off.
June 23, 2012 at 2:33 pm
I totally get feeling the weight of your age when it comes to infertility. I’ll be 29 in August and I keep thinking I have only one more year to have babies while I’m still “young.” But honestly, the age I’m really dreading is 35, because that’s when fertility takes a big decline. So if you think of it that way…you still have five years to go! Plenty of time for babies. Good luck with the IUI!!!
June 23, 2012 at 4:05 pm
yes you are right about that! When is your birthday?
June 23, 2012 at 9:39 pm
August 8th. Eight is a lucky number around here. 🙂
June 23, 2012 at 5:00 pm
I was always the same about my birthday, I loved it! This year was definitely a hard one for me. I can only imagine how hard it is going to be for you. But I hope you can still find it in you to have some fun and enjoy all the people that love you so much.
June 23, 2012 at 8:19 pm
I hope that you’re able to enjoy your birthday. I know how tough they can be while going through IF as every one that passes is another with empty arms. ❤
June 24, 2012 at 9:52 am
Those ARE two big things happening this summer! I have my fingers crossed for you and your IUI.
June 24, 2012 at 5:32 pm
me too ! thanks!
June 24, 2012 at 1:31 pm
I am the same exact way about my birthday usually, but this year I totally dreaded it. I hated the fact that I was turning another year older without a baby in my arms. However, when the day came it was still just as fun as ever. Not going to lie….wine helped 🙂 This is a big summer for you and I sincerely hope it is a great one in every possible way!
June 24, 2012 at 5:33 pm
oh there are definitely plans for wine!!!! 🙂
June 25, 2012 at 5:30 am
Oh, doing IUI. Best of luck to you too 🙂 I hope there will be no wine on your birthday then for obvious reason!
June 25, 2012 at 2:48 pm
I hope so too!!
June 25, 2012 at 9:16 am
I stopped enjoying birthdays around age 31… And I had no idea then that I was going to have trouble conceiving. 30 is just a landmark… a new decade… trust me, you are still young, even if doctors don’t say it as much (which they should)! I’m crossing everything possible for your IUI this summer!
My bday is the day after yours! But I’m well past the “dreaded age”….so there will definitely not be much celebrating. Unless you count retail therapy.
ENJOY your day! You’re still a spring chicken!
June 25, 2012 at 11:10 pm
Know how you feel in dealing with a birthday and IF… my 40th is around the corner and we’ll be starting our final IVF cycle soon. Not a great countdown 😦 Hope both our birthday wishes come true xoxo