If you’ve been lucky enough to have “tried” in your quest to have children for more than a few months, you might be familiar with ovulation prediction kids, basal body thermometers, charting, luteal phases, progesterone, pre seed…..the list goes on and on. If you’re anything like me, you’ve also tried or at least contemplated a few silly things you’ve heard through the grapevine has worked for someone else, or just done in a moment of pure insanity.
This list represents all of us who have done something you once might have thought was kinda crazy.
( TTC= trying to conceive……or in this case Top That Craziness)
~ Your husband has been late to work and used the excuse “Sorry boss, my wife is ovulating”. (Yes, this actually happened)
~ You know where to find the cheap Ovulation Predictor pee sticks (Amazon.com) and which brands are the best (Wondfo and Early Pregnancy Tests in case you were wondering)
~ You’ve ever sent a picture of the above mentioned stick to a friend ask if she thinks its positive
~ Your sex life depends on the darkness of the second line on that same stick (see right – that means get busy!!)
~ You set your alarm for the same time every morning, even weekends, to take your Basal Body Temperature and record it on your chart (6am every day!)
~ You’ve contemplated a homemade insemination for when you’re too tired
~ You’ve had a sperm themed birthday party (and an awesome one at that)
~ You’ve discussed, re-discussed and and discussed some more about each and every slight symptom that could possibly be a sign of pregnancy
~You’ve jumped up and down in attempt to figure out if your boobs are still sore (wasn’t me….cough cough)
~You’ve taken mucinex or robitussin and you don’t have a cough (bonus points if you know why)
~You spend hours comparing your chart to others’ on Fertility Friend and spend more time there than on Facebook
~Your doc tells you to schedule “fun sex” (riiiiight)
~You could teach a class on charting (for real)
~Overnight visitors be damned – sorry but I’m ovulating! (shhhh…..we have to be really quiet)
~You’ve ever wanted to poke a pregnant person in the eye for saying “we weren’t even trying!”
~You’ve ever skipped or been late to a social engagement to get busy (sorry but my wife is ovulating!)
~You’ve ever taken your morning temp wrapped in a blanket hoping it will magically get higher
~You’ve ever asked where you can get some of this “magic water” all the pregnant people have been drinking
~You’ve spent hundreds of dollars on supplements/vitamins
~You’d gladly eat a fish eye if someone could prove it would work (or really anything if someone could prove it would work!)
~Your husband has ever had to provide a sample in an essentially public restroom (VA hospital)
~Your husband has ever asked you if you could possibly come “give him a hand” in the above mentioned restroom
~Your husband has ever asked the nurses if they could “give him a hand” in the above mentioned restroom (as a JOKE people!)
~You see yourself in this list!
Feel free to comment and add your own because I’m sure I’m missing something!! 🙂
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