if you missed my intro post (explaining why I decided to try this), you can find it here.
If you missed Weeks 1-2, you can find it here.
So these couple of weeks were…..interesting.
First, I spent most of week 3 on my cycle, which increased my sweet tooth, even on the Plexus. Then, in a way that I can only describe as a combination of weather and breathing torture, it did this ridiculous sprinkling rain thing here (with some real rain) for 5 days straight, meaning the humidity was ridiculous. After that finally ended, my sinuses went completely out of whack for 3-4 days, which I had attributed to catching the twins’ head cold they had the week before, but may actually have been a form of detox. When I told my friend about my symptoms she explained that yes, it could be a cold, but she experienced something similar herself. She called it a ‘die-off’ or Herxheimer Reaction. In retrospect, it makes a lot of sense.
With that said, here we go:
While on my period, even Plexus can’t completely kill my sweet tooth, so for that week I definitely ate more sweets than I did in weeks 1-2. However, it was still half (or perhaps less) what I would normally consume during that time of the month so I consider it a win. Afterwards it leveled back off. Again, I still eat sweets, I’m just finding I don’t crave them like I used to and generally eat much less. Yesterday I had a cupcake and a mini bag of leftover mini eggs (totaling 12-15 I’d say), and that’s what I would now consider a high junk day. It is nice that I can eat a cupcake and not eyeball a second one – one is enough.
As I mentioned above, a combination of weather and either detox or cold made my allergies and asthma kinda suck these last couple weeks. I had been doing well not needing my albuterol before workouts but did need it more frequently. When my Flonase ran out I tried stopping altogether but that proved to be a premature move because it made my asthma worse. I should note, though that I used it for 2-3 more days and have subsequently forgotten it the last two nights without much issue. I’m still taking my daily Allegra and Singulair. Whether due to a cold or detox my sinuses in general were a mess for a few days which always makes my asthma worse. Even with all of that, typically one puff of the albuterol was enough, and I’ve still been able to avoid the daily inhaler. Today finally my sinuses are feeling like they are less nuts.
I am definitely seeing some fitness benefits. For the last two weeks I’ve participated in some track speed work. I’ve always done mine on the treadmill so I used a recommended pace calculator to find what my pace should be for the workout that was planned last Wednesday. The workout was 2×200 with 1 minute rest between, 8×400 with 2 minutes rest between and then 2×200 again with 1 minute rest between. The fastest 400 my most recent 5k time said was 1:39-1:44. My 400 times were between 1:28-1:32.
The following week the workout was a ladder. 400, 600, 800, 1200, 800, 600, 400 (with 1 min 30 seconds rest). It was also 81 degrees and sunny this week, something that typically slows me way down.
Recommended speed times/my times:
So my second 800 and 1200 were slightly slower or within the recommendation but the rest were faster or right at the cusp. Considering the heat, I’ll take it.
I had hoped to run a 5k yesterday but stayed out too late Friday night, still felt off sinus wise and my back had felt tight all week so the goal is to run one next weekend.
About the same
I feel like I’m recovering from hard workouts faster and they aren’t knocking me down as much as before. Granted, I’ve been doing more bike and short speed sessions lately and what I’m used to as far as “hard” workouts are long distance runs.
Bryan said he has seen a change in me physically. Overall, and particularly during my cycle, I’ve noticed a huge decrease in bloating.
Bring on the next two weeks.
It’s National Infertility Awareness Week, and I’ve been slacking on posts this year.
I’d be lying if I said a successful cycle didn’t lessen the sting of infertility, but even though I hardly write about it anymore (mostly because I am just not sure how at this point in my life) doesn’t mean that it isn’t still part of me. Yes, I write probably too many posts now about parenting, twins and toddlers because that is where I am right now and that was what this blog was meant to be about. Still, I can’t let the week go by without addressing it somehow.
I’m essentially re-blogging a post I wrote 3 years ago – an analogy that, as a runner, helped me explain infertility to those who might not understand. Running has been and is such a big part in my life that I find the analogy still fits.
I’ve finished two marathons.
It still feels weird to say that out loud. That, twice, I’ve trained, run 26.2 miles, and crossed the finish line. A feat I once related only to “crazy people” (well, that’s still appropriate) and people who run way too much (oddly now also appropriate).
When I started this blog, it began as a week by week training log for my second marathon, as I was preparing to do it mostly alone. A journey to the finish line. It also began as a place to log my fertility journey, as I was starting to feel more and more alone. Another journey to the finish line.
Infertility is a marathon.
At the start of the race, the excitement is palpable. We have all trained for this. We got up at the chirp of the alarm (and in my case, after several smacks of the snooze button) and regardless of the weather, regardless of mood, regardless of (most) illness, we ran. We ran 12, 16, 20 miles on a Saturday for no reason other than this day, this opportunity to run this race, cross this finish line, accept this medal, and feel this incredible accomplishment. We skipped movies and drinks and went to bed early. Months of runs, hundreds of miles. We are ready.
Adrenaline begins pumping right from the beginning, the first few miles a breeze. A thousand or more people in your exact situation are running with you, some a bit faster, some a bit slower, but it doesn’t matter. You’re all in this together. Even if you lose the people you started with, there are still plenty around to match pace with, plenty of energy left to get yourself there.
Discomfort begins to set in as the miles add up. The number of people begin to thin. You begin to realize just how far 26 miles is. You start to wonder what you got yourself into, and start the ipod search for your most motivating songs on your playlist. If you didn’t know you could run 20+ miles already, you might consider dropping out. But ultimately the vision of the finish line, the medal, the feeling of victory keep you going. Somehow, something pops up at just the right time that keeps you from declaring defeat – a random cheer from a stranger, a particular song, knowing who is waiting for you at the finish line.
Pain sets in around mile 20. The end feels so close yet so far away. Your body starts to scream at you. The group of a thousand you started with has dwindled down to 3 or 4. The slight envy you once felt for the faster runners has turned into full out jealousy. You know you’ve trained harder than most of them. Seriously? How are you all finishing before me? You begin to feel every step, every pound of the pavement. Any change in terrain is physically difficult to recover from. Curse words are becoming more regular. None of the three hundred Ipod songs are gonna do it, and even taking in half a Gu (an energy gel for distance runners) every mile doesn’t seem to be doing a darn thing. You hurt, you’re tired. You’ve gotta be the only one hurting this much. The finish line, though only a few miles away, feels like it’s never going to appear. The warnings that the true test is after mile 20 suddenly make sense.
Somehow, though, through combination of a force of will, stubbornness, training, and the few out of the group that stuck with you, you cross mile 26. And suddenly, though there are only a few runners left in the immediate vicinity, the crowd gets larger. You suddenly forget how sore you are because you can SEE the finish line. Somehow, you muster the energy to finish strong, because suddenly you hear your cheering section, the crowd clapping, the announcer calling your name. Somehow, you finished, and you feel incredible.
Also, you still hurt. But despite it, you kept running.
When I first stepped foot onto the pavement my first run, (which was like, halfway around the block before I couldn’t breathe anymore) – I never imagined myself running a marathon. In fact, even after my first half marathon several years later I thought to myself “who wants to essentially do this twice? No thank you!”
When I first imagined myself with a family, in my house with my white picket fence (though I’d really prefer a privacy fence at this point in my life), I never imagined it would be a problem. I didn’t even know what infertility was.
I’m still waiting to cross the finish line.
In retrospect, I survived marathon training one run at a time, one week at a time, one long run at a time. I survived the race, particularly at the end, one mile at a time. It still hurt, in fact, it hurt quite a bit. At the end my calves were so sore I literally hobbled to the car.
But I’d do it all over again. I’ll remember that day and who was with me for the rest of my life. All of the pain and exhaustion was absolutely, positively 100% worth it.
One day at a time, one mile at a time, I await the day I can say that again.
This post was created as part of The Analogy Project, started in order to help others better understand the infertility experience.
Mom isn’t here, but that’s cool because there is that other kid over there who somehow ends up next to me, like, all the time. She’s my buddy and I like her, so I guess I don’t mind. Plus this bed really functions well as a trampoline. Jump jump jump jump BOOM!
Oh hey! Mom’s here!
It is at this point that I realize I’ve dropped my pacifier. “Uh oh” I say, pointing at it, hoping that this time she will let me keep it instead of putting it back into that stupid brown thing.
Mom brings the brown thing over. Then, she does the craziest thing. She HANDS ME THE PACIFIER, and then expects ME to put it in the brown thing. My moment of hope is dashed. But she always looks happy when I do it, so I do it anyway.
Pick me up now, I think.
She goes over to the other kid. At least she makes her put her pacifier back too, because it would be really mean if she got one and I didn’t. But she’s taking too long, and I.want.picked.up.now.
“WAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!” I cry, because this really isn’t fair. I want to be picked up, and I wanted it done like, 5 minutes ago. She finally puts the other kid down and comes over to me, and to my horror, puts me down to change my diaper. You’re kidding me, right? I don’t want my diaper changed, I want you to hold me. I WANT YOU TO HOLD ME RIGHT NOW. “WAAAAAAAAH!!!!” I could say “up”, because I know it and use it frequently, but I think I’ll just scream instead.
Mom sighs. Wow, that was quick.
She carries me towards the stairs, but bypasses the light switch. Seriously mom? How have you already forgotten that I MUST turn the light switch on and off over and over again before we can even leave this room? I grunt at her. She MUST know this means that I want the light switch. She says “on” or “help” or some other English word she wants me to use, but come on? I just want the light switch.
Stairs! I want to climb down the stairs! I want you to help me climb down the stairs! Stop chasing that other kid! “down!” I say, trying to prove I DO use SOME English words, “down, down down!”. We get to the bottom and mom – how naive of her, thinks I don’t want to be held again.
“WAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!” “up!” she says. “Do you want up?” I do, but crying is easier. Can’t you see my holding up my arms? Geez woman!
Oh hey! Breakfast! “more, more more” I say, clearly indicating its my milk I want. She gets me blueberries. “More, more more!” I try again, hoping she was listening this time, but she’s cooking eggs. “hot!” I say, excited, but I still want my milk. Fine, I’ll give her one more chance. “More, more more!” I say, and she finally figures it out. I eat the eggs but what I really want is that circle cereal, and now I am done. “All done!”, I exclaim, and wait .2 seconds. She is not here. Why is she not here? “All done!” I say again, and wait longer this time – .5 seconds. This is crap. I start swiping food off my tray. I mean, geez, I told her I was done.
“Ah”, I say, eyeing her coffee. She gives me a sip. See? When you do what I want when I want it, I don’t cry.
Toys! Blocks! Puzzle! Cars! I throw it all! WAIT! THAT OTHER KID IS PLAYING WITH A CAR AND NOW I WANT IT! Now she has a book and I want that!
I’m bored now, so I whine. Mom turns on this weird show, with a colorful worm at the beginning. She says things to me like “horse”, and “blue” and “moo” and I’m like, whatever. I’m bored again. I wiggle. She repositions me. I wiggle and whine. She sighs. “Down?” she asks, and puts me down. NO I DIDN’T WANT DOWN!!!! “WAAAAAAAH!!!!!” She sighs and picks me up, but that not what I wanted either, so I wiggle. And whine, for effect. She sighs. She does that a lot. I dunno why – maybe she should get tested. She takes me outside. Outside! I like outside, in fact its one of my favorite places but I don’t want it now and I have no idea why. Instead of saying “no” I throw a tantrum, because I’m really tired of her not anticipating my every need all day today. Plus my mouth hurts. And I’m tired because I have a cold, but instead of saying “night night” I keep crying because crying is more fun and I want to see if I can make mom sigh a few more times before nap.
Toddlers – 1 Mom – 0
*Brought to you by toddlers cutting molars. And yes, we still have pacifiers at nap and bed. Don’t judge. Unless you want to come care for two teething two year olds. No? That’s what I thought.
For once, I have very little to write.
(Nearly) two year olds are hilarious, frustrating, sweet jerks. Especially when they are both popping out 2 year molars. But they are my sweet jerks and I can’t imagine life without them.
I don’t have much specific to report, but they learn new things every day. We got out of the house to visit places and people more this month – parks/playgrounds, Easter egg hunt, visits with family, Bee City, runs in the stroller. Whatever gets them (and me, to be honest) outside. More time outside = less time to blog, but more fun.
- We support mom at a local race (she won!)
- We “help” mom in the garden
- Miles “helps” me vaccuum
- We take our first trip to Bee City
- Yay warm weather!
- We prove we CAN play with the same thing together, happily!
- We don’t get the Easter bunny thing, but we do like candy!
Abby Video Bomb
As a brief summary for those who might be jumping in and missed my first post, after reading a few testimonies about Plexus helping allergies and asthma, I decided to to try it. I hate relying on allergy and asthma meds and if a chance exists that I can be through with them, it is worth a shot to me. If you want to read my intro post, here it is.
I had planned to write one post halfway through the two month trial and one at the end. I changed my mind and made it more frequent when I realized I was seeing some changes more quickly.
As a reminder, this is what I am using:
My friend recommended starting the regimen like adding new medication – start slowly and gradually add. So here is what I did:
Days 1-2 I drank slim only
Days 3-5 I added two bio cleanse
Day 6 I added one Pro Bio 5
By one week in I was up to the recommended number of each. The Bio Cleanse actually does recommend 4 per day (and gives you enough in the bottle to use 4 per day for the month), but I decided to start with two. So at this point I’m a full two weeks into using the Slim, but only one consistent week of the other two supplements.
First and foremost, I noticed a decrease in sugar cravings after only 2-3 days using the slim. To put things in perspective, I was a dessert after EVERY meal (well, not breakfast, but it usually consisted of something sweet) kind of girl. After only a few days a hostess cupcake sat in my lunchbox, UNTOUCHED, for a week. This, my friends, is BIG. I’ve also noticed that as a result, I’m making some smarter food choices. I’ve started making fruit smoothies 4-5x a week (sweet yes, but much more naturally sweet), snack less, and am eating fewer sweet breakfast foods (fruit loops, pop tarts etc). Now, do I still eat sweets? Absolutely. Do I still sometimes want dessert? Yes. At a birthday party yesterday, I had a cupcake – but only one, and I was completely satisfied, not eyeballing the rest of them when I finished it. This morning I ate cheerios and banana instead of Trix, and can walk by the box of cereal without taking two (or five) handfuls. We bought a giant bag of chocolate at SAMS last week, and I’ve eaten four pieces. FOUR. Usually, I’ll eat that (or more….ok usually more) in one day.
I do still really like cheez-its though. Dang cheez-its.
This is the big one, of course. I am still taking all of my allergy medications at night at this point. What I have noticed though, is that I’ve needed my inhalers less. I haven’t needed the pre workout albuterol for the last several workouts, though I still always carry it with me. I also haven’t been using the daily inhaler every day. I have still needed it, or the albuterol some nights, but not every night, and usually one puff is enough.
Is this a result of the Pleuxs? Maybe. My asthma can be inconsistent and always has been, so I don’t forget that, but we are in middle of major allergy season and I haven’t needed the same amount of help I have needed before. So it seemed worth noting.
One of the more “hidden” benefits, that I’m told, is improved athletic ability. Bio cleanse in and of itself is supposed to “oxygenize and energize” your body, and it combined with slim is supposed to help with energy levels and aid in recovery.
Yeah, I was skeptical too.
A week ago I ran my fastest mile (post twins) during a training run. Then Thursday I ran a mile at 7:37 and 7:53 AFTER a 16 mile interval and hill bike workout (with warm up and cool down, of course) in humid nearly 80 degree weather. The next day my legs were a little tired, but not sore. I remember thinking during a treadmill workout yesterday that I felt like I could breathe better through a hard workout. Placebo effect? The result of training in groups (which always makes me faster)? Maybe. But again, I find it worth noting.
About the same.
About the same, though when I drink Slim between breakfast and lunch, as opposed to first thing in the morning, I notice less of that post lunch need a nap feeling.
Anyone who knows me knows I’m a fan of a schedule. Even before I decided to put two embryos back knowing there was an increased risk of twins, I had planned to try to keep my much hoped for baby on a schedule. When I found out both stuck, I KNEW we were following a schedule. Sorry crunchy moms, but breast fed on demand twins? No, thank you.
Luckily, both twins have been pretty open to this idea – as open as babies can be, anyway, and I try to stick to it as much as possible, but of course holidays, company and trips can throw it off some.
Easter Sunday we went to a friends house for a brunch and egg hunt. The festivities started at 12:30 – normal nap time is between 12:30 and 1. Sometimes pushing nap goes well, other times it doesn’t. Luck was in our favor though because although they seemed a little sleepy they were happy overall. Maybe it was the candy.
Around 2:00, I’m standing in the driveway, ironically thinking that we should probably get going if they are going to have any kind of nap at all, when Miles walks up to me. One of my favorite aspects of this age is growing language, and not just because I’m a speech therapist. He stops, rubs my leg with his hand, looks up at me and says:
“night night, night night”
He was asleep in the car before we left the neighborhood.
I couldn’t have said it better,
Originally posted on Sunshine Dreams and Hopes:
When you were a child you could not wait to be an adult. When you became an adult you could do all you wanted. You would make the calls in your life and no one was going to change that. You could do anything. If you wanted to be a fireman then dammit you could be a fireman. If you wanted to buy a house then all you had to do was pick one, any one. Life was going to be that simple. You would marry the girl you wanted and when you were ready you would have a child. Some of the things you knew would happen as child happened. You got lucky and married an amazing women and after a while you try to have a child and that is where things get slippery. You have a low sperm count and she has endometriosis.
It does not…
View original 1,023 more words
Today has been one of those days that’s just a series of little things.
I had to go to court for a speeding ticket (my fine was reduced for yay for that at least). My hair tie broke. I realized I couldn’t participate in the group ride at the Y because I told Bryan to take the SUV to work. I stopped at Walmart in hopes I’d find a bike rack but none there fit both our cars. I came home and rode myself before I picked the twins up and got my THIRD flat in the last 6 rides. I burned myself cooking dinner.
I was tired and exasperated.
At bathtime I got Miles out of the tub, diaper on, dressed in PJ’s and sent him out of the bathroom to play while I got Abby out. As I was getting the towel ready, he scampered by my, reached his hand into the tub and splashed the water, soaking his shirt sleeve.
No big deal, right?
But I yelled at him.
I yelled at him for splashing in water.
I yelled at him for doing nothing but being a curious toddler who wasn’t even doing anything dangerous.
And he cried, and I felt like an @$$hole, because, well, I was being one.
Not my best mom day.
We all have THAT friend. You know you have one selling something she claims to be life altering one way or the other. One that posts stories about how this particular product helped her (or her friend) lose 30 pounds and feel amazing because she no longer needs 5 cups of coffee to get through the day. Now don’t get me wrong – I’m not saying the stuff doesn’t work, but I usually read over the testimonies because I’m not looking to lose weight, or rely too heavily on caffeine or sugar for energy.
I DO LOVE sugar, and I definitely justify one (or three) cookies, cake, or the extra bowl of cereal because I workout and stay fairly fit, but even that wasn’t what actually caught my attention. When I moved to South Carolina from Ohio 10 years ago (dang), I had very few issues with my sinuses. The longer I lived here, though, the more I began to notice problems. For awhile I only needed the occasional OTC allergy med in the heat of spring/summer. Then I needed one daily through the spring and summer, but not the winter. A couple of years ago, I was diagnosed with asthma, which (though its not proven) I’m 99% convinced is allergy related. Even then though, while I was given a prescription for a daily inhaler I rarely needed it, or the albuterol. The last 18 months or so have gotten much worse. I now take Allegra, Singular and Flonase at night, and rely on a daily inhaler in addition to albuterol before I exercise. If I don’t use ALL of these, EVERY DAY, I wind up wheezing – up in the middle of the night reaching for the rescue inhaler. This is year round – not just in the spring. As an avid runner and newbie triathlete, the asthma in particular DRIVES ME CRAZY. I CANNOT leave the house without my inhaler, and sometimes on a really bad day, even if I use it before I go, I have to use it again afterwards. I’m sure that less than fabulous lung functioning doesn’t help my speed either.
An old high school friend of mine sells and uses Plexus, and has posted many testimonials about how its worked for her and others. Most were looking to lose weight, which is why I scrolled by many of them as I mentioned above. The story that got me was the one where she (and others) mentioned that after a couple months, they NO LONGER NEEDED allergy medicine or inhalers (if they were used). I’ll be the first to admit I’m a skeptic. I read several stories and dismissed them. Eventually though, the thought of the possibility of no more runny nose, sneezing fits, or better yet, inhalers, piqued my interest enough to ask about it. And I decided to try. And of course blog about it.
Here is what I am using (excerpts taken from handouts downloaded on plexus power tools)
PLEXUS ProBio5 -a probiotic (in bold is what I am looking to target) ProBio5 features five extra strength probiotics, added enzymes, intestinal flora, B6 Grape Seed extract and vitamin C— all in one effective delivery system that supports the breaking down of hostile organisms that negatively impact your health. ProBio5 may provide the following results: Relief from typical Candida symptoms, which may include anxiety, recurring irritability, heartburn, indigestion, lethargy, extreme food and environmental allergies, acne, dry, flaky, itchy skin, jock itch, migraine headaches, recurring cystitis/vaginal infections, premenstrual tension, and menstrual problems.
One of my favorite bloggers also has boy/girl twins, who are three (I think). His blog is called Twinfamy (why didn’t I think of that?) and is a man of few words but very cute stories depicted by stick figure comics. A totally brilliant idea (why didn’t I think of THAT?). My own twins were still itty bitty when I began following his blog, and I remember thinking that although I approached the idea of toddlerhood with some trepidation, I looked forward to sharing the same kinds of stories.
Ladies and Gentleman – the time has come. Hello and welcome to:
“Things I Never Said Until I Had Kids (Part 1 of ?).”
As I mentioned in my last update, Abby LOVES her reflection. She finds it in both the more obvious (mirrors) and not so obvious (the car door) places, dances, claps, and moves side to side. Recently, she discovered she could find her reflection in the oven. I thought she was just looking closely at her face, but instead found myself saying:
Honey, don’t lick the oven
Miles doesn’t care much for his reflection, but has found noses of great interest lately. Not his own though. He sat in my lap watching Poyoco and I told him:
Buddy, please get your finger out of my (yes my) nose
The spring has brought with it some nice weather and since both myself and the twins prefer the outdoors to indoors, we spend lots of time outside. In particular, they like walks. Walks in the stroller, walks in the wagon, walking around themselves – they love it all. Just this evening Miles found a flowering bush and spent about 5 minutes walking back and forth bringing me flower petals. Once I finally got him away from the bush he headed forward and brought me something as I watched Abby:
Oh! Bird poop! Thank you!
Stay tuned folks. its just getting started.